June 7th, 2009 by Ravi Matah | Posted in Life   Comments Off on THE DARLING DAUGHTER
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Fortunate are those who are blessed with a daughter. It is the biggest gift from the Almighty to the parents. A daughter is an apostle of love, affection, laughter, cheerfulness and by her playful attitude keeps the whole household on their toes. Not only the parents, but the entire family is also attached to her being affectionate as she always is. Why would anyone in their right senses even think of killing their own daughter? Would you?

Thirty five years ago, we brought our daughter home from the nearby nursing home and we started collecting the paraphernalia essentially required for her day to day necessities. Little did we then realize that we had brought home a bundle of joy! Days passed and every day something new was happening. After about a year she became a mobile mischief and both of us kept running after her, caring for her, telling her stories, playing with her toys and making her laugh (or was it the other way round?)


She was the apple of everyone’s eyes and became the centre of attraction in the house. We felt elated. Then there were the chirpy talks and the captivating smile. Days became months and months became years. Time flies. We sent her to an English medium school where she passed her tenth and twelfth standard with distinctions in each of these classes. She did her grad and post grad securing first class and simultaneously did her professional studies also. Three years later she got a job in US and is working in worlds’ best software industries there. Almost seven years ago, we got a suitable boy professionally qualified, and from a decent family background, and settled her. By Almighty’s grace we all are happy.


I had to bring about the minor details above because I wanted to share these facts with my readers to emphasise the fact that a daughter is not a burden on you but a bundle of affection.


Now reading in the newspapers about the ‘murder’ of the unborn female fetus is highly disturbing. As per the report published by the UNICEF,  up to 50 million girls and women are missing from India’s population because of the gender bias against the girl child. In India there are about 90 girls for a hundred boys, and,  in the State of Haryana alone, there are 82 girls for a hundred boys, as per the press reports. There, families have to ‘purchase’ a bride to run their clan. What will happen if this nonsense goes on unchecked? The main reason for the disparity between a girl and a boy child is the dowry system prevalent in this country. For the poor family it is very difficult to foot the bill of the girls wedding and causes extreme hardship. And, now with the facilities of detection of the sex of the unborn child with ultrasound scanners, the female infanticide is on the increase. This practice is unheard of in other parts of the world.

 This anti-female bias is not only limited to poor families. Many financially sound families are indulging in this malpractice. Much of the discrimination is to do with cultural beliefs and social norms. These norms themselves must be challenged and changed , if this practice is to stop. The implication is that by avoiding a girl, a family will avoid paying a large dowry on the marriage of her daughter. .

 It appears that the Act in the Indian Penal Code under which these cases are brought is either mild or insufficient to serve as a deterrent to others and stop further escalation of this problem. Stringent measures have to be adopted to stop this heinous crime against the girl child. The parents of the unborn daughter as well those performing such operations are equally to be blamed and should be dealt with severely. Simply dragging them to courts for 10 to 15 years and then being let off for lack of evidence will not serve the purpose. I would like to suggest to those in power, that this is bloody murder and should be brought under the purview of Section 302 IPC and there should be no let off.

For God’s sake, let her take birth, let her live and with her own fate she will bring happiness and prosperity in the family.


What do you say?


Ravi Matah

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  1. Purti Kathpalia Says:

    Thanx for making my day by gettin this wonderful thought!! yes agreed we are all assets to our parents and not a burden!! like the “bundles of joy” and “mobile mischief”….v well written!
    As far as the female discrimination exists, i think a major part of this problem can be taken care by education…literacy can change one’s point of view! though the scenario has changed a lot overtime, yet the discrimination exists! 🙁
    i think different ways of punishin must come up- like making hospital rules more stringent or sumthin..coz u kno its more of lack of knowledge than a crime..people should be given surity of the fact that there girl child is safe and will have a safe govt’s assistance in marriage or sum other aid! so punishment and incentives and i think some schools like maternity schools must be open where general discussion take place…or sumthin, to influence and encourage people that girl child is a boon…live examples of sons who send their parents to old age homes or post-reirement places can be given to make them think and act practical….i think more than a prison, a “sudhar-ghar” or improvement cell is a better option!it might end up being a permanent solution!

  2. Shalini Says:

    Very well written…It’s so true being a daughter and now a mother of a daughter feel disgusted when I read about people who shun their daugter …The way to this is to educate the people and have really strict punishments …how can they forget that its a woman who gives them birth…if there was a no woman dammit they will not be there ………………

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